10 February 2006

Learning More About Myself

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Today, I learned a wonderful lesson.

First of all, please allow me to congratulate the Pittsburgh Steelers on winning the Superbowl.

Second, I would like to comment on our President irresponsibly spreading fear by talking about a bomb threat being thwarted…this threat was in 2002, and he is talking about it now because of the election coming up this year.

Bomb threats have been thwarted since the beginning of this country.  We have had 2 White Houses destroyed by the English.  We did not go into paranoia then.  We had Pearl Harbor bombed by the Japanese.  We did not go into paranoia then.  We had the Oklahoma federal building blown up by Americans.  We did not go into paranoia then.  Yet this president promotes paranoia because fear is all he has going for him.  That is very sad.  And when I talk to people who support President Bush, the only reason they have for supporting him is that they believe Bush will help them end Abortion.  The president cannot overturn Roe vs. Wade.  And that court case was about privacy, not about abortion.  Do you really want your medical records public for all to see?  Think about it.

Now about Sex Slavery that is still going on today.  Why is this allowed to exist in the world?  Women and children being kidnapped and sold, and nothing is being done in the name of freedom or even simple human decency.  Women and children are human, not objects or property.  Period.

Now on to the lesson I learned today.

This is a lesson my husband has been trying to teach me for a while now.  What can I say.  I am a slow learner.  ;-)  Being a Military Brat (Coast Guard), plus the oldest of three offspring, plus being a female born into a chauvinistic family, plus having a mother who could not speak English when I was born, I was a very responsible child.  My dad used to say, “if you can not do something right, don’t do it at all” or if he knew he was going to be late somewhere, he would not go at all because being late was unacceptable.  The military taught us that everything was suppose to be perfect.  As a child, I learned how to iron military creases.  At age 6, I was writing business letters for me mom, taking care of the bills, taking care of the checkbook, auditing the checkbook.  My dad’s sister used to make sure I knew this was nothing special and that I was no smarter than any other child.  So I thought all kids could do this stuff.  And I thought all kids were this responsible.

This kid is still inside me.  My husband tells me a lot that I do not have to handle everything myself.  It is hard to sink in.  When trying to get an appointment with the Pulmonologist who specializes in sleep, the doctor I was referred to did not accept my health insurance.  My insurance game me some other names that were on the plan and I was getting frustrated because I wanted everything to be “right”.  My insurance suggested I let the referring doctor and the other doctor’s office deal with it, which caused me to cry for some reason.  And then I realized it was hard for me to turn stuff over and not deal with it myself.  Which means my husband is right again.  I really need to work on this part of myself and realize I do not have to be responsible for everything and I do not have to handle everything myself.  Not an easy task for me.

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