25 March 2006

PMS

A friend of mine emailed this to me...the end is hillarious. I showed it to my husband, his favorite was the last part also:


The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his
Own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant other!!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.


DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.


DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.


12 Things PMS Stands For:


01. Pass My Shotgun
02. Psychotic Mood Shift
03. Perpetual Munching Spree
04. Puffy Midsection
05. People Make me Sick
06. Provide Me with Sweets
07. Pardon My Sobbing
08. Pimples May Surface
09. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Plainly; Men Suck
11. Pack My Stuff...... . And my favorite one...
12. Potential Murder Suspect



Pass this onto all of your hormonal friends and those who might
Need a good laugh! Or men who need a warning! And remember: Money
talks...but chocolate sings.



Another thing to giggle about... My husband, not happy with my
Mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able
To monitor my moods. When I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm
in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time
he'll buy me diamonds. Here have some chocolate.

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