My dad emailed me this about dogs. Since I have cats instead of a dog, I took the liberty of changing the word "dog" to "cat" and pluralized it since I have 3 cats, and though I have never known them to perform #5, they have been known to take over the computer while I am typing more than once. ;-)
Notice to people who visit my home.
1. The cats lives here...you don't.
2. If you don't want cat hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
3. Yes, they have some disgusting habits. So do I and so do you. What's your problem?
4. OF COURSE they smell like cats. What did you expect them to smell like?
5. It's their nature to try to sniff your crotch. Please feel free to sniff theirs.
6. I like them a lot better than I like most people.
7. To you they're cats. To me they're adopted children, who are short, hairy, walks on all fours, doesn't speak clearly, and I have no problem with any these things.
8. Cats are better than kids:
they eat less, don't ask for money all the time,
are easier to train,usually come when called,
never drive your car,
don't hang out with drug using friends,
don't smoke or drink,
don't worry about whether they have the latest fashions,
don't wear your clothes,
don't need a gazillion dollars for college,
and if they get pregnant you can sell the kittens.