04 March 2004

Questions from Elayne

Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and a trash pickup
is how close to the road the stuff is placed?

Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?

Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are
always white?

Is there ever a day when mattresses are NOT on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with the hopes that
something new to eat will have materialized?

On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message 'one slice'? How many
pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give
their vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?

How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures?

Why do we wash BATH towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? If not then
what was the purpose of the bath?

Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your
clothes would they eventually just disappear?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping
cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say 'Its all right'? It isn't
all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot'?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off
the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when
we complained about the heat?

Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?

Why do old men wear their pants higher than younger men?

If diamonds are a girl's best friend and a dog is man's best friend, who
really is the dumber sex?

How come we never hear any father-in-law jokes?

Why do men forget everything and women remember everything?

Why shouldn't all married men forget their mistakes? After all there's no sense
in two people remembering the same things right?

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